memorial day

this memorial day was the first time i have ever actually done what the point of the holiday is..
usually i am out of town or doing something else on this day that i never have time or remember to visit the graves of my loved ones.
well this memorial day was different. i haven't been out of the house much since my surgery so it was a real good change to go out and visit the cemeteries. my sister and mom and i bought a few flowers and went to my grandma alexander's grave, my grandma hintze's grave and my cousin austin's grave.

it was really nice to see the graves even though cemeteries aren't my first choice of a place to visit.
i enjoyed putting the flowers on the graves; i know that my family members were feeling special up in heaven and loved the beautiful flowers.
it also made me think about all of them a lot and made me miss each one of them.
even though i dont get around much to visit those graves they are special to me. :)
hope everyone had a wonderful memorial day and got around to visit their loved ones who are no longer with us.

craving

i'm craving everything!!
i might be happy if i dont have to drink liquids for a long while

but thats all i can eat right now.
so its sucks.

sick and tired of being sick and tired.

that saying could not be more true!

i truely am more ready to go back to working every day then i ever have been before. probably because i have spent the last week doing absolutely nothing.
heres what my days have consisted of
-waking up in SO much pain
-force a little something down my throat so i can atleast take my pain pill without being nauceous
-spend an hour drinking half a cup of smoothie
-watch movies
-take a bubble bath
-pain pill wears off so i force more cold liquid down
-watch more tv
-crossword puzzles
-play tiny wings ALOT
-have some much needed visitors come and watch movies with me
-take a pain pill before bed and cringe because i have to start all over.

waking up is really the worst part. my mouth and throat are so dry and in so much pain and it takes so long to swallow my food meaning it takes longer to take the pain pills.

i didn't realize that getting your tonsils out as an adult was 34598 times worse then getting them out as a child.
PLUS i got nose surgery too so that doesn't help with the tonsils healing at all.
blah this is getting super old and all i want is to be completely healed so i can eat normal food and go back to work.
well i'm probably just rambling on because i'm a little spacy from the medicine sooo i'll stop typing now.

i would like to thank my fans

I honestly have the best friends and family in the whole wide world!
I don't know what I would have done this last week without you. You have all truly made me feel better in every way. This surgery was such a scary thing for me and all of you have made it so much easier. I am so lucky to have such amazing and kind people in my life.
Here's a few reasons why this death week has been made better by the people in it,
They...
-catch me when I faint
-drive me places I can't drive on my own
-change the movies for me
-scratch my back
-walk me to the bathroom when I'm too dizzy
-feed me my meds when I'm dying of pain
-bring me all sorts of cold treats and presents
-fill my ice water up
-buy me humidifiers for my room
-tell me they love me CONSTANTLY
-visit me whenever they have spare time

I don't think I can thank any of you enough for this week. I love you sooooo much and if you ever need it I will treat you like royalty too!

the scoop

Today I had my surgery. This has been something I have NOT been looking forward to for the last couple weeks. Well... I did i
I couldn't eat or drink anything after midnight last night so by 11:45 this morning I was very very hungry. We got to the hospital and filled out some forms, i had to give them a sample of my pee but since I hadn't been drinking I had to just pee in some tupper wear at my house and bring it with me. Pretty gnarly.
They put me in this little waiting room, gave me hospital clothes, took my blood pressure and got a little blood sample. Then we just had to wait foreverrr. I was starving and anxious and just wanted to get it over with so after an hour and a half of waiting the doctor finally came and explained everything to us. Then the guy came in who was going to knock me out. That was what I was most worried about because I would be awake for it! I had to use the bathroom again because I was so nervous so I asked him if I could hurry and use it and he said of course. But someone was using it so he decided it would be a great idea to put the IV in before i used the bathroom.
I was tripping because I really hate needles. It was pretty easy though getting the iv it didn't hurt too bad but I was really terrified of the though of it. He said it would be smart to have my mom go to the restroom with me and it really was. While I was sitting on the toilet I fainted! My mom was holding on to me and when I woke up I seriously thought I was already done with the surgery.. but I was just sitting on the toilet Haha. After I was done the man walked me to the surgery room and as we were walking to the room I fainted again! I just really do not like thinking about needles going into my veins. Once I woke up again I was laying in the bed with an oxygen thing over my face and they were telling me to take deep breaths until I got knocked out. That's the last remember until I woke up when it was all over. They fed me some popsicles and were taking care of me for a couple hours and then my mom got to chex me out and now I'm home just trying to relax and keep my throat moist and not touching my nose. I am in quite a bit of pain but I figured that would be the case. I am going to watch some movies now but that's how my little surgery went!

2 more days.

i'm freaking out.
i get my surgery in 2 days and i am really starting to stress about it
i have never liked getting shots
or liked thinking about getting shots
ooor liked thinking about any kind of surgery/blood/wound
and i have to get surgery.
IN TWO DAYS!!!
i have been getting anxiety about it and not sleeping at night
i wish i could be knocked out with no IV, and stay asleep for a week while all the pain goes away
and then wake up and be perfectly healed
yipee wouldn't that be the greatest?
i'm done complaining now.

sunday funday

some sundays, i wish could be every dayyyyyyyy
like yesterday.
best.sunday.ever.
i spent the whole day with the besties and we just did whatever we wanted to do. it was sunny and warm which made it even more perfect.
*we went and ate the most delicious brunch
*went to the ghetto walmart and bought some things we dont need
*we got fro yo
*we laid out in the sun in our new not so cute swimsuits on our new lay out chairs
*cal and i made dinner and dessert for ourselves
*we watched a chick flick

ahh it was amazing. i wish days like that would come more often :)

staying strong

it feels kinda good to stick up for something you believe in.
it also hurts a little too
but i'm staying strong
:)
glad i have the best besties in the world!!

happy birthday collette

it was my good friend collette's twenty-first birthday on saturday so we all celebrated with her! it was a great night and i sure hope she had the best birthday everrr

double trouble

on friday night kayla and i decided to plan a double date for our men.

she wanted to go to a drive-in movie and then i thought it would be fun to cook dinner before. i came up with the idea of attempting to make cafe rio salads so we looked up some recipes online and went to fresh market.

half of the stuff on the recipe called for ingredients that i had never even heard of before. we were at the store almost an hour searching for everything that the recipes called for.

we FINALLY got everything we needed and headed back to my moms house to throw it all together. well we soon realized we had forgotten the lettuce (only the single most important thing for a salad??) so we sent jordan on a journey to grab some for us. he had NO idea where he was going though cause he is not familiar with holladay at all so he was gone a long time ha!





once he got back we were pretty much done cooking so we heated up the tortillas and started chowing down the grub!



and...

it was delicious!! they turned out really good :) i was super impressed with it and our fantastic cooking skills!




we had to hurry and clean up, clean out dicks truck and rush to the drive in to be on time. we filled the truck with blankets and pillows and saw something borrowed and soul surfer.





it was a really really fun night.

to my mom

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!

i cant even begin to express the love that i have for my mom. she is everything to me and more. i honestly do not know what i would do with out her around all the time.

we are super close and i love it. i still call her atleast once a day and she calls me too. we can talk and talk and never run out of things to say. i tell her everything about my life and she (almost) always listens :)

she always is giving me advice and only wants the best for me and for me too be happy. i really do appreciate it so much even though sometimes i dont act like it on the phone.

she truely is just the greatest mom ever. i love her so so very much and i hope to be like her when i'm a mother :)

home-made

tonight i am going to attempt to make a home-made cafe rio chicken salad.

wish me luck!

farewell dear tonsils

dearest tonsils,
we've had a good run
but you have been driving me crazy lately and really hurting me so it is time for us to be separated.
i probably wont miss you much
but i will try and spend as much time with you as i can until may 20 when that doctor takes you away.
love always,
me :)

romper ready

i recently fell in love with rompers.

they are comfy
they are cute
they are PERFECT for summertime

i have already purchased two and i dont plan on stopping anytime soon.



aren't they the cutest?

if you think they are ugly, please dont tell me.
because i love them :)

i run to youuu

right now is PERFECT running weather.
i really really need to start training for my 2 ragnars and half marathons coming up in the next few months and this weather is making it soooo easy to do that.

now i have no excuses :)

P.S.

today has been sunny and warm.
my sister and i went to the park and read our nooks in the sunshine

best thing ever. :)

water for elephants

i finished the book about 3 hours ago. I LOVED IT!
i laughed
i cried
and i couldn't put the book down
or put my nook down... if i'm being more literal
ten minutes after i finished the book
my sister and i trekked to the movie theater and saw the movie.
its crazy how much they leave out.
i definitely liked the book A LOT more but the movie was really good also.
cant wait to start my next book! still trying to figure out what it should be. :)