day 14: something you're afraid of

i am afraid of quite a few different and random things. fear is such a weird thing to me because you can feel completely fine and then something happens that you're scared of and you can freak out!
i am terrified of spiders! i always have been since i can remember. i refuse to squish them and always make someone around me take care of them. if no one is a round i will place a cup or something over it, so i know it cant escape anywhere, until someone comes home and gets rid of the creepy little creature. i have no idea why spiders are so scary, but watching them move around always gives me the chills.

i am really scared of blood, and needles. i could never ever be a nurse or anything medical because i couldn't handle seeing anything gross. i have passed out once because i saw my own skin get cut off, like a blister. i just have a very weak stomach when it comes to anything like that. so if you're ever bleeding, dont come to mee! thinking of needles going into my skin really freaks me out as well. whenever i go to the doctor and have to get a shot i hyperventilate and cry and the nurses treat me like i'm 5. i might as well be by the way i act when i get shots ha.

i am pretty scared of being in the dark by myself. i always freak myself out and hear noises that probably aren't even there. its from all the scary movies i watch, they aren't super terrifying when i am watching them but after i think of all the bad things that could happen and it makes me really scared of the dark. if i ever have to get up in the middle of the night for any reason i always cover the side of my face so i cant see anything but forward, because i get so nervous of what could be on either side of me. i am sort of a freak but oh well.

the last and probably biggest fear of mine is being in love with someone, and them in love with me, and having them fall in love with someone else and leaving me in the dust. i have seen it happen so much in my family and i just feel like why wouldn't it happen to me? i get so jealous over the dumbest little things because i think they for sure are in love with that other person. even if i have no reason to believe that they are not in love with me, i always jump to conclusions that they aren't. i guess i need to have more trust but its hard.

being afraid sucks. i wish i wasn't scared of anything